Real Housewives of New Jersey Episode 4 June 23, 2013

06/24/2013 09:51

***Please note:  My comments on any individual appearing on The Real Housewives shows are limited to the "characters" created by Bravo.  It is not personal or meant to be a commentary on any one personally.  With editing and storylines, Bravo creates "characters" to love or hate.  My opinions are all about Bravo's characters.  Thank you for reading. 




We open with dueling scenes of Melissa telling her husband about Gia's party and Tre telling her husband about Gia's party. Best part of this scene was Baby Joey. How delicious was he in his little pj's??? (Why didn't Bravo give us a picture of that deliciousness??)  

We now know that neither family is great at counting....not sure that comes as a big surprise to any one.

Clearly, Melissa was set up again. She went to that party for Gia with the best of intentions. Obviously, she had no other reason to go there other than for the children. I really give her credit. I know that could not have been an easy thing to do. After a year of not speaking to Tre, to walk into a party full of people you know don't like you, just for the sake of the children is pretty generous. I bet Melissa thought of a lot of things Tre would try to start with her about, but obviously she didn't count on Tre confronting her about how many days it took her to visit her father-in-law. As predicted, Melissa is met with a gang of hostile women ready to pounce. Kim D and Linda couldn't wait to start the drama. I bet they were counting down the hours to that moment. Let's face it. Kim D lives for these moments. Melissa maintained her composure, answered to the best of her ability and then politely excused herself when she realized there was no winning. I think Melissa deserves a medal for managing that situation.

Teresa has no business judging Melissa or her relationship with her father. If Melissa really wanted to torment Teresa, this would be the way to do it: be the best daughter Nonna has ever had. She already hates Melissa for taking her Joey from her, and for taking her show from her (that is how Tre sees it) can you imagine if Melissa went full court press in relationship building and won over Tre's parents? If Melissa really wanted to torment Tre she would have been at the hospital morning, noon and night. She would have been flying in the worlds best cardiac surgeon's, she would have been paying for a private suite for the Mama, having catered meals sent up for visitors and staff, etc.... Jeez, wouldn't that be fun to watch!!!

The thing is, Melissa just doesn't care enough about Teresa. Although Teresa is convinced Melissa is envious of her and came on the show to bring her down, the fact is Melissa is plenty busy running her own life. She has a husband, three beautiful little children, a big extended family that is very close, a career, friends, etc. Melissa has a full life and obviously she doesn't have time to devote to tormenting Tre. But oh how fun it would be if she did! 

Conversely, it seems Caroline has nothing but time. Let's face it, there is only so much menu sampling a woman can do (and still keep the Bravo cameras rolling) She is still thinking that meddling with Teresa and Joe is a good thing (or at least a thing that will keep the Bravo cameras rolling). Let's not forget, Tre and Joe didn't even ask for her help, she just decided she is so wise and so amazing that she has to use her skills as a trained counselor.....oooops, I mean trained that isn't right...a skilled mediator? no......meddling colleague. Yes, she has to use her skills as a meddling colleague to mend a deeply rooted family problem in another family. I guess Caroline is pretty confident in her abilities. I hope she is right!

At a party that Kathy is hosting, Caroline decides to let Kathy and Melissa know that Tre wants nothing to do with them. (They haven't spoken in a year, I kinda think this can't come as a big surprise) Caroline declares "I am not telling you this to be cruel, I am telling you this because I care enough to be honest" which leaves us to conclude one thing: Caroline really doesn't care about Joe Gorga that much because last week she lied to Joe ...because she cares.... At this moment I am reminded of an opening tag line we hear each week "Love me or hate me, I always speak the truth" I am so confused. Does she or doesn't she "always speak the truth"? Is the tagline a lie too? Who does she care about?  Is honesty always the best policy?  I'm getting a headache.....

Anywho.....Caroline accuses Melissa of not being able to be civil.  That was unnecessarily offensive. I know Melissa can give as good as she gets, but Melissa doesn't start with Tre and Melissa went to that party with good intent and conducted herself in a very civil manner. Why does Caroline feel it necessary to irritate Melissa? Caroline has private meetings with Melissa's husband and then insults Melissa at a party in front of cameras. Why?

Let's talk about the gym. Do we think it is coincidence that Tre and Joe are at the same gym at the same time and this is the first time this has happened in a year? And do we think it is coincidence that Tre is at the gym in full hair and makeup? I think not. But, let's pretend it is all a big coincidence.... Did anyone else think it odd the way Tre initially behaved? After not speaking to her brother for a year, she approaches him as if nothing is wrong. She behaves like she just saw him yesterday. Which I suppose is better than what comes next. She couldn't leave it there. She couldn't just say "It was nice seeing you" and walk away. She HAD to go there. She had to complain to Joe about Melissa not getting to the hospital to see Nonno in the proper timeframe as prescribed by "off the boat" Italians who have been living in this country for decades. Obviously, the fact that her brother was very ill at the time is of no consequence to Tre because it doesn't help her justification for attacking Mel. Tre doesn't ask her brother about him being ill and hospitalized. She just goes for the jugular. Why on God's green earth would she think this was an ok thing to do?? Did she think Joe would agree with her? Did she envision Joe saying "Tre, I know, my wife just doesn't get it. I tried to tell her the rules for "just off the boat" Italian families." We know this is what Tre would love to happen, but at this point she really should know better. Teresa obviously doesn't understand, nothing will get Joe to turn on his wife. Nothing. Joe and Melissa have a sacred union. Even if Melissa was wrong (she wasn't) Joe wouldn't turn on her and especially not with his sister. Why would Tre still hold out hope that he would? And when Joe decides to turn the table, in hopes that Tre would "get it" pointing out problems with her husband, Tre completely misses the point, has a temper tantrum, throws water at Joe, knocks over a garbage can and storms out. How many times did we hear Tre knock Melissa? She accuses her again of lip syncing, she knocks Melissa's book, etc. How many times did we hear Melissa knock Teresa's books? Teresa can't feel good about herself unless she is putting someone else down. She is so devastated by the fact that Joe loves Melissa, she feels it necessary to tell the world that Melissa can't possible be more worthy of Joe's love than she is. She is so insecure, she thinks the only way to get Joe's love back, to be number one to him, she has no other choice than to let everyone know she is better than Melissa and more deserving of Joe's love. It's so twisted.

By the way, if there is a vocal coach within the sounds of Tre's screetches, can you please step up? Think of it as a public service. Think of all our ears, think of all the dogs ears you will be saving. Seriously, someone needs to put an end to that horrid screeetch already. It's painful.

Personally, I think there are some relationships that can not be mended. We all face that fact at some point. There comes a time you just decide it will never work and leave it alone. Move on. Count your blessings. There are some people who will never get it. Tre will never get it. She is too determined to be right and to be number one to Joe. Unless and until that changes, the relationship will never work. The only relationships that work in Tre's world are with people who are willing to say, do and think what Tre wants them to do, say and think. She has no need for anyone else. Because in her crazy narcissistic mind, she is always right. Kim D is the perfect friend. Kim D just wants camera time. She is willing to do whatever it takes to get it. If it takes being Tre's "hired gun", then so be it. Kim is ready, willing and more than able to take on the job. Actually, Kim D manipulates Tre to create these opportunities! (If Melissa wanted to torment Tre, she could very easily recruit Kim D. to team Melissa. It would take very little for Kim D to switch sides, just promise her more fame and exposure. Wouldn't that be fun??? )

Moving on.... How can you not love Kathy? God bless her. She at least recognizes when it is time to step off. Good for her! Besides, it looks like Kathy gets enough drama in her life from her sister and husband! Those two are funny as hell and provide more than enough entertainment. As funny as they are, I have a feeling they both give Kathy plenty to do with damage control.

Rosie is a passionate woman. No doubt about it. I never for a moment mistook her for being (Bleeping) Amish! lmao! The smoking, drinking, cursing Rosie is not afraid of letting anyone know exactly how she feels! It is probably a good idea to stay on her good side. Just sayin.

This week's "gem" from Ritchie comes at Joseph's expense. Did he really just tell the world that his 16 year old son isn't into girls? That'll go over well at school for Joseph. Ritchie, think then speak. Think THEN speak.


This week we finally get to enjoy a glimpse into the book writing process with Melissa. There are still a lot of unresolved, conflicting emotions when it comes to her father. She still struggles with these feelings. I think Mel needs to know it is ok to love her father and his memory. It is also ok to accept he wasn't a perfect man but he did love her with all his heart. It will be interesting to see how deep she decides to go with topic in her book. Understanding her background will give this book heart as her publicist points out. It will also help us all better understand Melissa. I am not in need of marital advice, but I am always interested in a person's "back story". We all have one.

You can pre-order Melissa's book by clicking on image.  


Show photos are from 


##Addendum  Let me clarify this.  Do I think Caroline has evil or sinister intentions?  Absolutely not.  Do I think she should get in the middle of this?  Let's put it this way, I wouldn't.  Of course things happen on reality television that most likely might not actually happen in reality.  And, as I have mentioned, editing can make situations appear differently than they really are.  I am commenting only on what I saw on the show.  Personally, in the real world, in my own experience, Caroline is a lovely, well-intentioned woman who comes from a good place.  Actually, Kathy, Jac and  Melissa are all lovely women.  I don't beleive any of these women would set out to intentional hurt anyone.  Please understand, my comments on this blog are strictly regarding the characters as we saw them on the episode.  My sincere apologies if I have unintentionally hurt anyone with my remarks.